Doubts
by cccourtc
Summary: Draco's Thoughts Growing Up


I do not own Harry Potter. rated for some language

I always listened to what my father told me. He told me stories of the Dark, and taught me about the Dark Lord. I was taught that I would one day follow in his footsteps. We went to Diagon Alley to get my supplies for my first year of Hogwarts. That's when I met him, the boy that would soon become my rival and later my enemy. I didn't know it at the time. We exchanged a few words. I was suspicious and asked if his parents were our kind. He told me that they were and I was relieved, scared that I had been talking to a Mudblood. He left and soon after I did too. I went home that day hoping to see him on the train and be friends, anyone was better than the idiots Crabbe and Goyle.

He was Harry Potter! The boy I talked to was Harry Potter. I was so excited to find out that boy was Harry Potter and I looked for him on the train. I was sure that he would love to be my friend. Nothing had ever been denied me as the heir to an ancient, wealthy pureblood family. I entered his compartment to find him with a Weasley. How dare that blood traitor! He stole my friend, so I was naturally snarky when I asked for Harry's friendship who dared to speak so coldly to me and reject my generous offering. I swore as we ran out of the compartment that I would get back at him.

I sent him and his Weasel sidekick on a fool's errand by challenging him to a duel. I sicced Filch on them only to find them eating breakfast the next day. How did he get away with these things? He seemed to get away with everything, flying without permission, getting a broom, wondering out at night. When I heard about the dragon, I decided that he would not get away with it this time, but McGonagall didn't believe me. Instead, I lost points and got a detention. The night of my detention, I saw Potter, Granger, and Longbottom looking sad. I didn't ask what happened. They deserved whatever they got for getting me in trouble.

The forest! We were going into the Forbidden Forest. I heard there were werewolves in there! To make it worse, we separated and I got stuck with Longbottom, the worst of the lions. I walked off with him. We walked and walked. I was tired of his sniffling, so I snuck up behind him and scared him. How was I supposed to know he would panic and send up sparks? He is such a waste of pureblood. Then, Hagrid came running and I got stuck with Potter. We walked, the woods becoming spookier by the minute. Just as we rounded a bend, we saw the unicorn and something came out of the woods. I ran wanting to save my life, sure Potter would follow. Of course the Gryffindor idiot would stay. We came back to find him in the company talking to some centaur. Of course Potter would talk to centaurs. Stupid Potter!

Just when Slytherin won the House Cup, that stupid headmaster had to go and award points to the 'golden trio'. They didn't deserve them! We won and they took it away. I went home that year wanting nothing more than to get my revenge.

I overheard father talking to an 'old friend'. There was going to be a plot at Hogwarts to kill the upstart mudbloods. Father was going to use something of the Dark Lord's to kill them. I didn't really understand, but he said it as a repeat of fifty years ago. I can't wait to see Potter's face when his friend, the teacher's pet, is dead!

The Chamber has been opened. Now is the time for Purebloods to rule over the pathetic weaker mudbloods. They are just taking over our world. Grander is in danger. I bet Saint Potter wished he had taken my hand now that he is in trouble. All the students think he's Slytherin's heir, but I know better. I just wish I knew who he was so that I could help him.

Granger was attacked. It's a shame that she was only petrified, but oh well. Maybe the next mudblood will die.

A Pureblood was taken into the chamber. I mean, it was only the Weasley chit, but still a Pureblood! I thought we were safe. I thought only the mudbloods were in danger, but now no one is safe and Dumbledore is back and the school may close. I like Hogwarts and being acknowledged by Potter and his gang, even if I get in trouble for it. What will I do if I'm forced to go to Durmstrang like my father wanted?

The Weasley girl was saved. Of course Potter and his sidekick would save the day an win the House cup. Ugh! I hate him so much. Next year for sure, I'll beat him.

Sirius Black escaped Azkaban! The man who gave the Potters' location to the Dark Lord! Oh, I can't wait to see Potter get in trouble for chasing him. He might even get hurt! Oh, the year will be so much better than the last!

Potter fainted on the train. I can't believe it. This is excellent material to torture him with, the look on his face! It's a shame the oaf is taking over for Care of Magical Creatures, but maybe I can get him fired and forced off Hogwarts property. Father will be so pleased!

My plan worked. The first COMC class as a disaster, although my arm is healed, my father will ensure the beast is killed and Hagrid fired. This year is turning out great!

I just saw Potter's head in Hogsmeade! He is going to get into so much trouble. I ran all the way back to Hogwarts and to Snape. Potter will finally get what's coming to him!

Potter didn't get into trouble. I'm so mad. How does he get away with everything? Maybe tricking him during his next game will make him fall and get hurt.

It didn't work and I got into trouble instead. Severus was so disappointed. I'll just have to try hard. At least the best will die. It's my only consolation.

Granger just punched me! How muggle! It hurts though, so we ran away. That bint made it so that I can't see the oaf blubber when the creature is killed. I hate Potter and his gang.

It's forth year and the Triwizard Tournament is coming to Hogwarts! I can't wait to see it. Maybe father will convince the champions to meet me. I hear Krum is coming. It was amazing to see him in the World Cup, and even better when father tried to eradicate some mudbloods, too bad Granger was safe with Potter.

Potter is a champion and I just know this year he will get hurt! There's no way he can escape it. Father and I disagree about how long he'll last, but it's impossible for it to be too long.

Potter just came from the graveyard with Diggory's body! He's going on about how the Dark Lord is back, but that's impossible. Father would have told me if he was rising again. It was so good to see Potter knocked off his high horse and bleeding, but it's not like he's some bloody hero who lived after a war. He's just Potter, an arrogant fool who refused my friendship. At least if the Dark Lord is back, Potter doesn't stand a chance at living.

The Dark Lord has taken over our manor. Father cowers before him, kissing the robes at his feet. It is disgraceful for a Malfoy to behave like that. Father lied to me. He says that he is very close to our Lord, so why must he grovel like a mudblood? I don't think I can trust him as much as before. My only hope now is that Potter saves us from this disgrace.


End file.
